YOU WERE WARNED . . . #1

So, some of you have been asking, wondering, or just sitting back and waiting to hear.  As you know there has been some turmoil in my family.  As you should also be aware from monitoring my posts, I have remained quiet and not broadcast my business on facebook.  Some of you have asked me in person, some have texted, some of you have even noted that you have read comments by others that are obviously directed at me.  Still, I refrained.  I have not read any of the posts that are supposedly directed at me, nor do I really care to read them.  If they say what I am told they say, they are far from the truth or reality of the situation.  So through this series of notes, beginning with this one I will try to clarify the situation and give you my side, as some of you have been bombarded by their side.
It starts out simply enough - I AM GAY!!  This should not be a surprise to anyone of you, as I hide nothing.  This is however somewhat of an issue for certain members of my "family".  Those of you who know my family know and understand that I have a brother-in-law who is closed minded, and unwilling to accept alternative lifestyles.  This is where the gist of the problem lies.  He tends to laud his bigotry and hypocracy high over anyone who allows it.  I am not willing to stop being myself for his benefit, and I am not crawling back into the proverbial closet just for his peace of mind.
Now, if his bigotry alone were the main issue things might not have gotten to the point they are today, I have barely spoken to my sister or parents in over a month, and they have not seen the boys during that time either.  This is all by their choice.  Oh, they will say I am acting like a child, I am jealous of this or that, and that I am unwilling to communicate.  Well, That is far from the truth.  I am not jealous, I am far from a child, and I am more than happy to communicate (on an intelligent and level field).  However, the bigotry that exists has caused my own parents to choose to turn away from me and the boys to please the anti-gay side of the family.  They fear that they will be kept from my neice and nephews if they do not cower to the bigotry and hate that comes from that home, so they have dicarded me, my partner, and the twins as if we never existed to them.
Oh, they will say it was all my doing, all my decision to part ways.  This is partly true.  I have only asked that we be ONE family.  That we all be treated with the same respect, and that we all love and be loved equally.  I have only ever wanted to be accepted as my true self, and have my partner and my children accepted as well.  Because one does not want my partner and I around others, we have to decide to send the boys alone without us, or keep them from certain functions all together.  Well, we do not have the twins often enough to pass them off on our weekends or our visists with them.  This is unacceptable to me, but others don't understand that.
How can you claim to be a family when there are TWO separate Thanksgivings, TWO separate Christmas's because the GAYS cant be around certain family members?  YOU CAN'T!!
So, this is the root of the issue.  This is the beginning of the story.  Choose to read the next posted note, or choose to remove yourself all together.  Know that these people are blocked from my facebook, and if you choose to communicate these notes to them, you might not like the results.  Not from me, I could care less at this point.  I have found acceptance and love in the form of my partner's family.  They have accepted us, they love and spoil the twins, and we are truly ONE FAMILY!!  This is all I have ever wanted, all I have ever asked for.  I simply ask for my parents to understand and stand up for ONE family, ONE EQUAL LOVE FOR ALL!  Until then, I will continue on this journey with the support of the freinds and family I do have and WE will survive.
LOVE TO ALL!!!

VALENTINES AND HEARTS

At this time last year I was entering into a new relationship with an amazing guy.  My life was looking up and all seemed to be heading in the right direction.  Now, one year later, we are still together and things are going so well with us.  The twins think the world of him, and he cherishes them so much.  I could not be happier with the progression of our relationship.  When we met I could  not have imagined that we would have gotten so close so quickly.  We connected instantly, and we are inseparable to this day.  I can not imagine my life without him in it now.  It amazes me how one year has made us so strong and so in love.  Last Valentine's day we had only been together for a few days, now we are celebrating one year together, and looking forward to what the next year has in store for us.  He has been here for me through many rough times in this past year, and he continues to hold my hand and stand by me as I go through the heart break that exists in my life right now.  I could not have been as strong as I have needed to be this past few months had he not been here keeping me going.  He makes me see things clearly, and he helps me talk through situations as they arise.  We hold each other's hands and help one another through anything that arises and that is what makes ours a strong and special relationship.  There are those who still scoff and judge, but they have no idea what we go through together, and how our hearts have bonded to one another.

There are those who have turned their back on me, and those who continue to talk behind my back, but I know that for each of them there is another who supports and encourages me. These who support me and encourage me along the way are my HEARTS.  As I celebrate Valentine's day this year, I celebrate the HEARTS in my life.

Here are the HEARTS I celebrate as I look at my life.

HEART #1 - My wonderful partner -  He is here for me through everything, and I know that the love we share is the kind of love that will last a lifetime.

HEART #2 - My amazing children - These twin boys are the strongest, most resilient 11 year-olds I know.  They have been through so much with their mother and I, and our new relationships.  They have been through so much with the recent stresses of our family situation, yet they never fail to smile and amaze me and make me smile with pride.

HEART #3 - Friendship - I have some of the most amazing friends.  From lifelong friends to the new friends I am making everyday.  They are all so supportive and full of encouragement and acceptance.

HEART #4 - Family - It may seem ironic to some that I post this one right now, but without my family I would not be where I am today.

HEART #5 - School - My colleagues and my students make every day at work worth every second.

So, as I celebrate Valentine's Day this year, I am celebrating the LOVE that I feel from the HEARTS in my life.  Everyone one of them is an important force in who I am and who I continue to be.