While I Slept

March 6 is a day to be remembered, although I don't remember it or 30 of the 37 days that followed.  It seems I let pneumonia get the best of me and it took me down (almost out).  I was put in a drug induced coma put on a ventilator and given a slim chance at recovery.  It is my understanding that while I "slept" there was even talk of "pulling the plug".  As I "slept" support surrounded me and my many loved ones sent powerful thoughts for my improved health.  Even though I don't remember anything from those first 31 days, there are a few things that I know for sure.

1. My amazing partner did everything in his power to help me fight.  He was by my side pushing and begging me to return, to "wake up" and come back.  Rick was the driving force behind everyone else rallying to give hope to what seemed to be a hopeless situation.  He never gave up on me, and he made sure no one else did either.  He held my hand regularly.  Even though I don't remember, I am certain that I felt his presence and made sure he knew that I was aware he was there.

2. My parents and sister were ever present as well.  They were stunned and confused and facing decisions that they were not prepared to face.  As I "slept", I never imagined the pain I could be causing by not leaving someone some simple instruction or plan about my care should I ever be faced with such a situation.

3. My ex-wife (my best friend) and my children were also there as support and encouragement as I "slept".  They begged me to awaken and to return to myself.  She and the boys pushed right along with everyone else for me to overcome and return.

4.  My "in-laws" were at the ready any moment to step in and do anything that needed done to pull me through, as I "slept".  They were there to support, encourage, and hope along with everyone else. 

5.  While I "slept" many friends and family members from all over sent positive thoughts and hopeful wishes for my recovery.  They posted messages on facebook, sent text messages, and sent cards and letters.  They did all they could to encourage me to awaken and return to myself.

As I "slept" much went on around me that I will never know or remember.  However, I am aware of all the love, support, and encouragement that was coming my way and that helped me to return home on April 11.  I spent many days and nights not knowing what was happening, who was who, or even who I was.  I was incoherent, un able to talk, bed ridden, and "out of it".  As I finally came around and began to understand things, I began to realize I would never know the intensity of the number of people who are behind my recovery.  It is to everyone who is there that I say "Thank You from the bottom of my heart".  I am home, talking better as the stoma heals, learning to walk again, and taking each day as a total gift from everyone who has given support and encouragement.  I would never have imagined illness would take me down like this, nor did I ever realize how much simple tasks like walking are taken for granted.  I ask everyone who reads this post to do me a couple of huge favors.

1. Wake up each day thankful to see the day no matter the weather you are facing.
2. Remember, as you go from place to place, be happy for each step.
3. Never say "I'll do it tomorrow".  If I had gone to the Doctor when I should have, I might have been able to avoid losing 30 plus days of my life.

I will never get those days back that I "slept" away, but I will make the most of each day forward and I will overcome all obstacles as I re-learn to life my life.

Thank you everyone.

LOVES